Post by John.Post by AaronPost by John.My wife has started having panic attacks when she's driving (been driving
perfectly OK for over 24 years) and I came to this group to see if I could
Driving along the road, perfectly happy, all of a sudden, without any
warning or any trigger whatsoever, she suddenly gets stomach cramps, feels
cold and clammy, the colour drains from her face, her hands clamp tight on
the steering wheel - so tight that her knuckles go white, she feels like
she's going to be "beamed up" and a sense of impending doom and gloom. She
slows down to a crawling 10 miles per hour and becomes a danger and an
annoyance to herself and other drivers - all they do, of course, is to blast
their horns, give her the finger and shout and scream for her to get out of
the way - all of which doesn't exactly help.
She is very healthy, has *no* illnesses, she's *not* depressed and is
perfectly happy in every other way except for these panic attacks while
driving - and it's *only* while driving. She has never had any panic attacks
in any other situation except driving and she's perfectly happy as a
passenger.
Trouble is, her job requires that she drives - no driving means no job; no
job means no money; no money means no house etc., etc.
She is *desperate* to find a cure for this. It's now been about 2.5 years
since the first attack and, although she's managed up to now, she's
definitely getting them more often and they are becoming more debilitating.
Any pointers anyone?
John.
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Your situation is the perfect paradox. This is not to imply it is
contrived.
See real doctors before acting on advice from forums. The quick fix
is not safe if the problem is happening behind the wheel.
The GP should rule out non-psychological reasons first, and do blood
work.
Have you asked your wife what is going through her mind at the time of
panic? Is it merely focused on the physical experiences, or is she
actively experiencing fear? You may ask her what she was thinking
about in the moments before she first noticed the symptoms. She may
not be depressed, but if she sees her job as a card at the bottom of a
huge house of cards, it may be creating instense pressure, in the case
she is not happy at work.
Since this is a public forum, and I'm allowed to express opinion. I
find your post on first reading (I will read it again later, and maybe
be proven wrong) to be kind of detached from feeling sympathetic to
your wife, and more like you just want to fix a broken device that is
integral to your wife. This could just be my sensativity on matters
mixing with your style of writing. I am not accusing you. Just
remember that sometimes in marriage, wives feel undervalued and
overpressured. These feeling build up slowly, and they suppress them
out of obligation they feel to remain strong. But the mind is only so
strong.
The GP will hopefully realize that it is not logical to use a
medication which may impair your ability to drive while you are
driving, which is exactly what would happen if you took the approach
of a fast acting minor traquilizer.
A psychiatrist will probably realize the same thing, I would think,
but may have alternative solutions when he gets the whole background.
You seem sure you wife is *not* depressed, but many people hide their
depression. They put on a happy face.
Things bubble up from the sub consious. If a job involves driving and
the panic attacks happen while driving, well there's a possible
connection. A Psychologist may be able to help your wife talk through
this and in my experience, by making connections can be the first step
to a cure. I don't know if this is the case for everyone, but it has
been for me.
All that said, I'm really take a scientific empirical approach to
these matters. Please understand this is just my take on things.
Don't take what I say personally or anything. I'm interested in these
topics I have experienced these symptoms so I can relate. But, even
I am suggesting things you may not like to hear, it will not be
productive to get angry. If you do, please think about using the
mechanism of debate, whereby you point out that I have mad an
assertion you disagree with.
Forums are a great, until people fight. If you have to walk on
eggshells in order to not fight, some utility is lost, but it is well
established that arguing in an atagonistic nature is bad.
I do admit, I sometimes "rant" because I have so much going on in my
mind. I hope you were able to filter out some useful information from
this post.
Seriously, good luck with your situation, the one thing I hope you
realize is that it would be dangerious to use medication while
actually driving.
Best Regards,
Aaron
Hi Aaron,
No offence taken at all my friend :o)
The trouble with using a forum like this newsgroup is that there just
isn't enough time or space to write all the information that's needed I
suppose. It would take me hours and hours of typing and page, after page,
after page to get all our thoughts and feelings across so I was just
trying to get the salient points across - trouble is, it's not easy to
condense such a lot of stuff into such a small amount so that (a) people
will be able to read it and offer advice, and (b) not get bored.
Something I should have said is that she has tried Cognitive Behavioural
Therapy at the hospital. The trouble with that was that they put her on a
course called "Beating the Blues" and were treating her as though she was
(or is) depressed, but we don't think that she is. After about 4 or 5
weeks (one 2-hour session per week) she talked to the consultant and said
that it didn't seem appropriate treatment for her problem. She said that
it seemed more geared towards clinically depressed people (for example, on
a scale of 1 to 10, how suicidal do you feel?). In fact, she said that it
was *making* her feel depressed. The consultant agreed that it wasn't
suitable for her but offered no other help, just cut her loose.
She has no worries in any other aspect of her life and is fit and healthy
in all other respects apart from these panic attacks when driving. Oh, and
in case anyone suggests it, she hasn't been involved in any accidents or
bumps or even a near miss - there just doesn't appear to have been any
trigger event whatsoever.
She has also tried a course of treatment with a clinical hypnotherapist
but it did no good. She has just made an appointment to see another guy in
case the first one just wasn't a good one, so hopefully, maybe something
will come of that.
As to your comment about me not sounding sympathetic to my wife but rather
just trying to fix a broken thing, I can assure you that that's not the
case at all, I am very sympathetic. I will however, admit to being very
frustrated because I can't understand what's going on. I don't understand
why, after 24 years of accident-free driving - something that she used to
enjoy - this has just happened out of the blue. And I suppose it's twice
as hard for me to understand because I *love* driving and have done for 32
years.
The other thing, as in so many facets of life, is money. I don't know
where you live but we're in the UK where we have the good old National
Health Service, where there is currently an 18-month waiting list to see
any health professional in this field so we've paid for everything
privately up to now, and the money is beginning to run out. Don't get me
wrong, we'll take out bank loans and pay whatever we have to, but it's
just the uncertainty of it all - will there ever be a cure for my wife or
will we go bankrupt trying to find one?
Thanks for taking the time to reply Aaron.
John.
Yes, the job and the driving - quite a double-edged sword, unfortunately.
of 16 she started a career in the Civil Service. Over the years she's had
she had gone straight into this department straight from school.
all day. She spends four days a week on the road, driving to various traders
into the office one day a week. Every day is a different place, a different
scenario and different people. She loves the variety and has become a much
what makes the panic attacks all the more bizzare and less understandable.
John.